SEG Student Mail 9/14/19

Good afternoon!

Please make sure to keep checking the weekly calendars for all the events occurring at SEG. 

As you can tell, things are progressing well with construction.  Steel will begin going up next week. The final walls will go up after the steel.  The renovation inside of SEG is moving right along as well.  Floors are being poured and the elevator shaft is being installed.  After that, walls begin to go up!  For those that don’t remember; the renovated area will house our new cafeteria, band room, art room, and STEM lab.

Drop off and pick up has been going well this year.  Thank you to everyone who has altered their drop off locations, staggered their times, and helped get their children to school in a safe and efficient manner.  Our new bike rack came in and quickly filled up!  We love to see our students being active and getting themselves to school.  As always, please be mindful of those students crossing streets, bus loading/unloading zones, and when the traffic arm of the bus is extended.  Thank you again for helping keep Lincoln Ave. free of congestion during these times! 

Students will get the opportunity for the first time ever, on Monday, to help determine the clubs that are offered in the next round of club participation.  In homeroom, they will be able to offer suggestions for what they would like to see offered.  After that we will look to get moderators for these clubs and see if they are feasible for the next session.  We are hopeful that we get many awesome ideas from our student body.  Clubs have been an overwhelming success thus far, with more students than ever participating here at SEG!  We look forward to the upcoming sessions, which begin in the middle of November.

We are about a month away from the RBHS entrance exam 8th grade parents.  Make sure to keep October 13th on the radar. 

The first PTO Board Meeting of the 2018/2019 school year will be held on Wednesday, September 19, 2018 at 6:30 p.m. in the S.E. Gross Cafeteria.  Please join them to find out about the new year of exciting events and enjoy a complimentary sweet treat.  

Once again, we would like to offer the reminder, especially early in the year, about setting clear expectations with your child on social media and electronic device usage.  It is the recommendation of the school that if your child has an electronic device or social media accounts that parents are checking them very routinely, if not daily, and that electronic devices do not go into bedrooms during sleeping hours. Please remember that children are the most vulnerable to over usage of devices and the temptations of social media.  Below is the text of an article in Psychology Today about student usage of social media accounts.  This article is meant to offer many very solid ideas about how to manage social media with preteens and teenagers, which is something that can be difficult, especially as your child looks to gain independence. 

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Why Social Media is Not Smart for Middle School Kids

Tweens' brains are simply too immature to use social media appropriately.

 

Victoria L. Dunckley, M.D. is an integrative child, adolescent and adult psychiatrist, the author of Reset Your Child's Brain, and an expert on the effects of screen-time on the developing nervous system. 

 

I really love middle school kids. I have two of them! If you have been through middle-school parenting, you may have noticed what I see: Strange things seem to happen to a tween’s brain the first day they walk into middle school.

One might sum up their main goals in life this way:

  • To be funny at all costs. (Hence, the silly bathroom jokes, talking at inappropriate times in class, and the “anything it takes to be popular” attitude.)
  • To focus on SELF — their clothes, their nose, their body, and their hair.
  • To try new things. They are playing “dress up” with their identity, trying on things to see what fits. They are impulsive and scattered, they are up and they are down, and it even seems that they have regressed in their development on their quest for independence.

As the parent, you are changing, too, as you enter the stage of parenting when you quickly depart from the naïve platform of “My child would never…” to the realization that, “I’m sure my child did that. I’m sorry, and please excuse his behavior, he is going through a phase.”

Your list of daily parenting instruction may include statements like:

  • "If you can’t say anything nice, don’t say anything at all!"
  • "How many times do I have to tell you not the use that word?"
  • "Stop flipping that bottle!"
  • "Stop burping the ABC’s!"
  • "You’re acting like a 2-year-old."
  • "What were you thinking?"

Then it happens: Maybe because we are exhausted from their constant begging for a phone, or because we think that all their friends have one, or because we want to upgrade ours to the latest model…we cave. We act on impulse. Our brain seems to regress like theirs, and we give them our old smartphone.

And with that one little decision comes the world of social media access—something we haven’t thought about and something none of us is prepared for. Because the midbrain is reorganizing itself and risk-taking is high and impulse control is low, I can’t imagine a worse time in a child’s life to have access to social media than middle school. Here are just a few reasons why:

  1. Social media was not designed for them. A tween's underdeveloped frontal cortex can’t manage the distraction nor the temptations that come with social media use. While you start teaching responsible use of tech now, know that you will not be able to teach the maturity that social media requires. Like trying to make clothes fit that are way too big, they will use social media inappropriately until they are older and it fits them better.
  2. Social media is an entertainment technology. It does not make your child smarter or more prepared for real life or a future job; nor is it necessary for healthy social development. It is pure entertainment attached to a marketing platform extracting bits and pieces of personal information and preferences from your child every time they use it, not to mention hours of their time and attention.
  3. A tween's “more is better” mentality is a dangerous match for social media. Do they really have 1,456 friends? Do they really need to be on it nine hours a day? Social media allows (and encourages) them to overdo their friend connections like they tend to overdo other things in their lives.
  4. Social media is an addictive form of screen entertainment. And, like video game addiction, early use can set up future addiction patterns and habits.
  5. Social media replaces learning the hard social "work" of dealing face-to-face with peers, a skill that they will need to practice to be successful in real life.
  6. Social media can cause teens to lose connection with family and instead view “friends” as their foundation. Since the cognitive brain is still being formed, the need for your teen to be attached to your family is just as important now as when they were younger. Make sure that attachment is strong. While they need attachments to their friends, they need healthy family attachment more.
  7. Social media use represents lost potential for teens. While one can argue that there are certain benefits of social media for teens, the costs are very high during the teen years when their brain development is operating at peak performance for learning new things. It is easy for teens to waste too much of their time and too much of their brain in a digital world. We know from many studies that it is nearly impossible for them to balance it all.

How Can Kids Slow Down?

First, we need to slow down and rethink what we are allowing our kids to do. We need to understand the world of social media and how teens use it differently from adults. Here are a few tips that work well for many parents.

  1. Delay access. The longer parents delay access, the more time a child will have to mature so that he or she can use technology more wisely as a young adult. Delaying access also places a greater importance on developing personal authentic relationships first.
  2. Follow their accounts. Social media privacy is a lie: Nothing is private in the digital world, and so it should not be private to parents. Make sure privacy settings are in place but know that those settings can give you a false sense of security. Encourage your teen to have private conversations in person or via a verbal phone call instead if they don’t want you to read it on social media.
  3. Create family accounts. Create family accounts instead of individual teen accounts. This allows kids to keep up with friends in a safer social media environment.
  4. Allow social media only on large screens. Allow your teens to only use their social media accounts on home computers or laptops in plain view, this way they will use it less. When it is used on a small private phone screen they can put in their pocket there are more potential problems with reckless use. The more secret the access, the more potential for bad choices.
  5. Keep a sharp eye on the clock; they will not. Do you know how much time your child spends on social media a day? Be aware of this, and reduce the amount of time your child is on social media across all platforms. The average teen spends nine hours a day connected to social media. Instead, set one time each day for three days a week for your child to check their social media. Do they benefit from more time than that?
  6. Plan face-to-face time with their friends. Remember that they don’t need 842 friends; four-to-six close friends are enough for healthy social development. Help them learn how to plan real, in-person, social get-togethers such as a leave-phones-at-the-door party, a home movie night, bowling, board games, cooking pizza, or hosting a bonfire. They crave these social gatherings so encourage them to invite friends over and help them (as needed) to organize the event.
  7. Spend more real non-tech time together. Teens who are strongly attached to their parents and family show more overall happiness and success in life. They still need us now more than ever. It is easy to detach from them: Teens can be annoying! But attaching to family allows them to detach from the social media drama. Your child needs to feel like they can come home and leave the drama of their social world behind for a few hours. They want you to help them say no to social media and yes to more time with the family. They are craving those moments to disconnect, so make plans and encourage this at home.

Don’t give that smartphone all the power in your home; help tweens choose healthier forms of entertainment. They have the rest of their life to be entertained by social media, but only a limited time with you.





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